Finally, “Hanging Tree” comes out into the world today. This song’s the catalyst that drew out a whole album behind it. During lockdown one of my dearest friends became distant, and then was found dead.

“Death follows me around like a bad smell” is all I remember saying after the initial shock died down.

The pressures on his mental health overcame him.

It struck me that all he needed and wanted in life, all that was already in him, though the mind can cloud that realisation to yourself, all now was impossible.

His lot in life was spent, like some bargain sold off too soon in some shady back room deal.

Why is it the sweetest souls suffer so much?

While those dead-eyed people so often helm countries and multi-national corporations get to such a position of power due in no small amount to their cut-throat, insensitivity.

It’s precisely the way of thinking – this, “work till you drop or you’re soft” mentality that labours so much on the minds of people, getting to them, eventually making them unwell.

All the classics happened to my friend before he took his own life. Lost his job. Lost his relationship. Moved back in with his parents.

Then there was the crippling Irish covid lockdown where you couldn’t walk 2km from your house at some points.

Nowadays, that job stuff weighs on you because there’s some new Americanism “losers v. winners” that pervades our cultures and is making us as sick as it makes them.

My friend was a genius. He on two separate occasions sent be very generous amounts towards album crowdfunding campaigns from having one tens of thousands in poker tournaments.

There were mental health issues that culminated over years. But, I really think there was more for him in life. Just, it was almost like our time was too uncaring to see him for what he was. A glistening gem.

I saw it, clear as day. Few others did, too. And that’s why my sadness for him, is coupled with a grave sense of anger. As it wasn’t just mental illness that came out of nothing, it’s the pressures of a sick system that drew the darkness so close.

So, this song’s for him, and the whole album’s dedicated to friends like him.

Next time your sensitive, loving friend loses his job, his relationship, congratulate them. Say, “well done, let’s grow some fucking veg, and buy a few chickens. Till this whole world blows over.”

That’s what I’d do now, anyway.

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13. March. 25